Psychologists out there saying things like "I only give medicine to people I would bang" and they just get away with it.
Like, think about how important HRT is for the average trans person. It's completely life-changing and unmatched as a medical intervention for that population's mental health.
And these people are withholding it based on "would I fuck that?" standards.
I was a patient of Zucker's; he was very much like this. He explained his very conservative verdict on HRT (a tentative prescription of blockers after years at the clinic) by citing my lack of femininity; in particular, that I was still wearing pants. I noted that my mother, and his research assistant (a much younger woman, like all of his research assistants I saw over my treatment), the only two other women in the room, were both wearing pants. He mumbled something about "different styles." He always felt entitled to me like that, thinking nothing of asking a high schooler about my fetishes during appointments for reasons he never decided to give. The judgment only goes one way.
When I was referred to an endocrinologist, he not only took Zucker's cautious prescription at face value but also recommended I see an aesthetician about my eyebrows. When I showed myself not especially grateful for this treatment, he expressed an unwillingness to increase my very low dose of HRT, since most trans women would be excited about this. He referred me to another doctor and washed his hands of me.
I had been excited and hopeful, but that considerably faded after several years of being sexually demeaned by Zucker and then him. I wasn't a wide-eyed girl anymore, I was a bitter, broken shell of a woman, twisted both physically and mentally. So excitement and hope rotted into cold hatred. Let me have my hormones and I'll let you have all ten of your fingers. I could hide it, but I couldn't make it look like gratitude.
They want to be your judge and, if they wish, benefactor, a pediatric Pygmalion letting only the sexiest of minors transition. They are nothing more than petty tyrants of the endocrine system, bullies all grown up who have found an easy and lucrative source of bodies to hurt and control.
This is what people demand to go back to when they want transitioning to be even harder.
Some other horror stories from the notes.
This needs to be considered some form of malpractice for real.
